How to keep kids entertained on an allotment without ending up in A and E

First of all, let's be clear: kids don't help on the allotment. They trample over seedlings, they pick things that aren't weeds, they eat blueberries before they're ripe, they snap  bamboo canes, they sting themselves on nettles and cut themselves on brambles, then demand you find them a plaster. Then they have a fit because … [Read more...]

Goodbye crap week, hello spring.

Off the plot, it's been a fairly shite week: a broken (painfully expensive) molar*, chicken pox - and subsequent sleep deprivation - followed by nits (not me, I hasten to add.) And last night - with chicken pox finally under control and 'normal' sleeping patterns resumed - the dog woke up at 5am and proceeded to shit out half … [Read more...]

Grow your own lemons

I started growing things when I was about seven or eight.  Someone gave me a Ladybird book on Indoor Gardening  and my obsession with sticking things in soil began.  Probably because it was way more interesting than reading Peter and Jane. I’m not sure why I decided to start with a lemon, but I did.  I can’t even remember if it … [Read more...]

Silent Sunday

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losing the plot on the plot

When I mention I’ve got an allotment, people often assume I’m some kind of kaftan-wearing vegan earth-mother, whose kids have never tasted Haribo. Yeah, right. In reality, we just don’t have space for a veg patch at home. One day we might move to the sticks (if Unhusband gets his own way) but until then, it’s an allotment in … [Read more...]